Friday, January 1, 2010

Once in a blue moon

If you've been wondering where on earth I've been lately.......I've been out of state- I've driven a 1,000+ miles- and it feels like a million.......I've been in crisis mode for the last 14 days.

It seems almost strangely prophetic- that in this, the cycle of the blue moon, my mommy would have to leave this earth. She loved all things Blue Moon related, her signature color was cobalt blue and she loved watching the sky for clouds, stars and the moon.

I wish that I could say that this is some weird, cruel, sick joke- but it's not. My beautiful, vibrant, zany and incredibly talented, 56 year old mother passed away on December 18th, 2009.

What happened is the question that people keep asking me- and the answer is- we don't really know. It seams it was a series of small things that came together in the perfect storm.... and really- how she died isn't nearly as important as how she lived.

The following is my eulogy from the service to celebrate her life on December 29th, 2009.

I am humbled by the amount of love and support from friends and community this week.

And today as I look out at all of you- I know that mom would be so flattered.

I’ll be brief as I don’t know how long I’ll last without melting today!

My mother was a beautiful, loving, generous and wildly talented woman. Pity she didn’t truly realized how much folks appreciated her.

She did what she did in this life in the hope that she could be a help and a blessing to others. Her love spread from here to Africa and back. She was incredibly loyal and generous to a fault. She found the beauty in the little things in life and was frequently known to rescue the casually discarded= antiques, pets, people……

I have had the last week to reflect on my incredibly untimely loss- and my sorrow is immeasurable at losing one of my very biggest fans, she was my hero, my protector and my very bestest girlfriend.

And while I certainly don’t have to like what has happened- I do have to accept it.

The clock on the wall still ticks, the wind still blows, the earth still turns, and my heart- while broken- is still beating.

We used to joke that our motto in life should be “eat desert first- life is uncertain…” And really- that should apply to most everything…. This physical life is very uncertain- and we should live like we don’t have a tomorrow- because you just never know….

Today, as we go back out into the world after we leave this service…….if we can - pay it
Forward (she was a big fan of this).

Never meet a stranger, or leave friends and family without a kiss & hug,
Say I love you, say it like you mean it- don’t leave things unsaid,
Play nicely with others,
Love big, Laugh much,
Hope often,
Pray in earnest,
Celebrate the smallest victories,
Sing- and make some joyful noise.

God needed only the best to lead the choir in heaven, and that is why he called her home. Go in peace today.

I am finding that (so far) through this blur of days- that I am far stronger than I ever gave myself credit for- just who she raised me to be. I'm not sure how long the ever present tears will rain down my cheeks at the drop of a hat- but for now- I can only put one foot in front of the other- please keep our family in your thoughts- send us positive energy- we need it right now.


Bears Fan said...

Hi Didi and family, your Mom will be truly missed, I am glad that I got the opportunity to get to know who she was. Keep your chin up, your just as strong as she is.

Scott said...

That was a lovely eulogy Di. I wish we could have been there. All our positive energy is and will be headed your way, and we will keep you in our hearts... Always,
Love, Scott, Kelly, Devan, Cody, and Brynn